Tony Robbins Tips On Changing The Way You Feel

Great tips from Tony. These have to be practiced to be believed. IT REALLY WORKS!

Tony Robbins: How to deal with STRESS and DEPRESSION

Great advice from Tony. Such an abundant matter and brilliantly deconstructed!

Lessons From Netflix - You Have the Ability to Change Your World

By Kathleen C Olivieri  

Raising two daughters meant one thing in our house - we watched a LOT of "chick flick" movies. We watched movies such as Hairspray, The Holiday, How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, Titanic, Legally Blonde, and the list goes on and on. Most were for entertainment, but many movies had a hidden lesson that we talked about. Yes, there are "Lessons Learned" when watching movies!

The New Movie Theatre - Netflix

Now that my daughters have gone to college, my husband and I have forayed into the world of Netflix. So many series and movies to watch!

A friend on Facebook recommended a Turkish show, Kurt Seyit and Sura, which is a historical drama based on a true story.

To spare you the 42 hour-long episodes, the premise of the story is this: an officer of Turkish descent and a wealthy Russian heiress fall in love in the early 1900's. Seyit, the officer, survives the war, then takes Sura home to meet his family. They hate her because she is not Turkish. Seyit and Sura flee the Russian Revolution and settle in Istanbul. Through their adventures, their love is not enough to keep them together. Ultimately, Seyit and Sura never marry.

We loved this series! Not only were the costumes beautiful and historically appropriate, there were beautiful horses, interesting characters and the acting was spectacular.

What are the Lessons Learned from Seyit and Sura's Love Story?

Lesson 1: Personal Responsibility 

You must take responsibility for your life. We all want to be loved. Yet, ultimately, YOU are responsible for that love. YOU are responsible for getting love and keeping it.

How does this translate to your professional life? YOU are responsible for your career and professional happiness. If you want to progress in your career, invest in yourself! If you are not happy in your career, then take responsibility to make a change in yourself or your work situation.

Lesson 2: Perseverance

You must persevere through the good and the bad. The world will change and people will try to sabotage you.

Yet, YOU must be strong to persevere and NOT allow the world and people to have the power to sabotage you.

How does this translate to your professional life?

The world is changing around us. The jobs of yesterday may or may not be available tomorrow. For example, the retail industry has changed due to social commerce and online shopping. Many brick and mortar stores are closing. What does this mean for the people employed at these stores? What's next for them?

Will You Adapt in the Changing Economy?

I predict that many of the smart, savvy displaced people will turn social commerce and go into business for themselves - opening their own micro-enterprise using the very channel that pushed them away from a career they may have loved! You have the ability to change with the world! By the way, if you are interested in building your very own micro-enterprise, contact me and I can tell you how YOU can do this without moving or going back to school!

Conclusion

Unlike Seyit and Sura, my husband and I have been married for almost 28 years. There is no secret to relationship success other than personal responsibility and perseverance.

The same is true for our professional lives; there is so secret to success other than being responsible for your success and persevere when others have quit.

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This is How to Let Go of Being Attached to Situations in Life

By Tony Fahkry

"I have no idea of what tomorrow will bring, so I wish to prepare for it."

"You fear tomorrow - not realizing that yesterday is just as dangerous."

The delightful short tale by Anthony de Mello underscores the fact that our attachments to the past can be equally harmful.

We must release our hold of yesterday's concerns and bring our awareness to the present moment, if we desire to seek contentment.

It's a given that most people want to experience happiness and joy. There are many ways to achieve it and while some attain it, others don't. However, it is no less a central desire to seek fulfillment in our everyday life.

We want happiness to fill the cup when pain overflows. Yet the irony is we experience more pain and suffering than joy allows.

We attach our desires to people and situations, holding on tighter than we should. We stress about matters that impose upon our happiness and become discouraged.

Things don't always go as planned. People let us down. The road ahead gets bumpy.

Buddhist author Lama Surya Das writes in The Big Questions: How to Find Your Own Answers to Life's Essential Mysteries: "As Mark Twain said, 'It's not what we don't know that gets us in trouble, but what we are sure we know'. We attach to one or more particular ways of seeing ourselves that, neither accurate nor helpful, entrap us in mind-forged forged manacles, self-limiting beliefs, and unfulfilling, misdirected behavior patterns and desires. We fall into living as we are not and lose who and what we actually are."

The Art of Detachment

Detachment means to disassociate yourself from intended outcomes. It requires letting go of fixed ideas how life should be.

If you commit yourself to getting what you want, you set yourself up for pain.

For example, if you base your day on your partner's mood or getting the next promotion at work, you allow outward conditions to dictate your feelings. You are trying to control your world instead of trusting the process of life.

"Normally we think we see reality, but what we see is our own subjective perceptions, filtered through all of our associations and desires, as well as through language and conditioning," states author Ezra Bayda in The Authentic Life: Zen Wisdom for Living Free from Complacency and Fear.

Let Go of Attachments

This requires practice, though it is possible to let go of attachments that no longer serve you.

You might ruminate on the past and hold on to things that don't matter anymore. What if you were to enjoy the richness of the present moment instead?

Make it a point to let go of anything that's not for your highest good, especially expectations.

Do you often worry about the future?

Do you base your feelings on whether you are moving forward in life?

Either way, make it a priority to let go of attachments by cherishing the depth of each moment. Move beyond your negative thoughts and allow life to be exactly as it is.

Letting go is grounded in the wakefulness of the present moment being perfect as it is. Whilst you expect things to be a certain way, detachment means to let go of these thoughts.

"When we see through our attachments by fully experiencing them, the result is freedom. When we can see and experience life without the filters of our judgments and demands, the result is appreciation and the quiet joy of being. When we see through our fears, the result is love," states Ezra Bayda.

Let Go of Expectations

Expectations set you up for disappointment. Whilst it's normal to receive respect and love from others, sometimes people don't return the respect or love you deserve. Happiness means acknowledging this, so you avoid hanging your hopes on people fulfilling your emotional needs.

If we are attached to life being a particular way, we are assured of being hurt when things do not follow as expected.

The solution, you ask?

Let go.

Consider psychotherapist David Richo's view in The Five Things We Cannot Change: And the Happiness We Find by Embracing Them: "We cannot take refuge in feeling good, because that cannot be sustained. What is sustained and sustaining is a yes to what is, 'taking the good with the bad'. This can only happen when we have no attachment to how things should be."

Let Go of Outcomes

Do you want to work toward your goals and dreams while letting go of outcomes?

Focus on pursuing what is meaningful and give it your undivided attention. People pursue what they consider will make them happy, yet remain miserable now.

To work towards a prosperous future, flow with the currents of life instead of being on a roller coaster ride of ups and downs.

Steady is the way.

Author Jan Frazier offers the following wisdom in The Freedom of Being: At Ease with What Is: "When you are free, you no longer experience attachment - to the roles you play, to possessions, to ideas, to the outcome of action, to the people you love. You are free of ferocious desire, of the driving 'need' to get (and keep) what you want."

Fulfillment Comes From Within

As much as we want to believe that success and happiness happen 'out there' - it simply isn't true.

Happiness and fulfillment emerge from within.

Ask those who are content what their secret is and many will tell you, they learned to simplify life and let go of attachments.

They loosened their grip and allowed life to serve them. They are grateful for the pleasant and unpleasant moments because both experiences contain the seeds of opportunity for growth.

They are unattached to how life should develop and trust every experience serves their highest good.

Think back to a time you released your attachments to something.

Maybe it was resentment or holding on to a particular point of view. As you let go, you no doubt felt relief and moved on.

That is the significance of letting go. You let go to move forward, instead of dragging the past behind with you.

"When you are unattached, you have inner freedom. You have no investment in a particular outcome, and so you do what is necessary in the moment. You explore every option and are receptive to all new information. You do all that you know to do, and then trust, because you have no attachment to either the result or how the result is produced," affirms authors Charlene Belitz and Meg Lundstrom in The Power of Flow: Practical Ways to Transform Your Life with Meaningful Coincidence.

So, release your hold on tomorrow. Do not blemish the present moment with your attachments of how it should be.

If you are anxious about a particular matter, simply let it go. Drop it as though I were handing you a hot piece of coal.

Keep letting go until you get to a place of nothingness and have released all attachments and suffering.

Only then will you know true peace and joy in its entirety.

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The Secrets to Self-Mastery | Interview with Dr John Demartini

Fantastic interview with Dr John Demartini. Covers so much ground and is the master of human behavior and in my opinion the leader in the personal development field.

How to have more CONFIDENCE

Direct, no frills approach to simple yet difficult to master skills.

How To Improve Interpersonal Skills With Social Intelligence?

By: Sandeep Atre

All relationships are based on that all-important connect’. And just the way, to establish a contact, two persons need to share factual information, in the same manner, to establish a connect’, two persons need to share emotional information. And the best part is that the desire to connect’ is so deeply woven into each one of us that people keep sending emotional signals all the time. 

The only difference is that more often than not those signals are subtle, in the form of gestures, postures and expressions. And that is the realm of social intelligence’. So, how successful you are in connecting to people primarily depends on how well you can understand what is going on inside them. People’s behavior is eventually a reflection of their emotions. So if you can connect emotionally then you can synchronize behaviorally and thus excel interpersonally. 

We define Social intelligence as Observing nonverbal behavior and understanding emotions for greater interpersonal effectiveness and self-management’. Thus, it is a skill backed by conceptual depth. It helps you observe a person’s gestures, postures and expressions in the light of the emotional counterparts.

We all know that humans are social animals and the basis of our social being is interpersonal communication’. One look at our evolution and it becomes absolutely clear that we are wired to connect, because there is no other way we would have survived all that we did. But are we connecting anymore? Look around and you would find that if not destroyed, the very basis of our social being is surely under serious threat.

At homes, fathers are busy staring at their smart-phones, mothers are busy watching television, kids are busy with their videogames and teenagers are tuned into a song in the I-pod. Similarly, at workplace, bosses are busy looking at laptops and employees are either logged into their company’s intranets or some social networking sites. Even the education hasn’t remained unaffected. Teachers are looking at their PowerPoint Presentations rather than at students and students are also preferring online videos to learn from.The scene in business is no different either. Customers are choosing e-commerce websites over a real shopping experience and Customer Care Executives are busy checking out customer records in CRM software rather than relating to the very same persons standing in front of them.

Yes! We are looking less at people, listening to them less, being less mentally-present in conversations and are paying lesser attention to their reactions. Those speaking silences and subtle interactions of the past are today struggling in the impulsive hands of Poke, Ping & Post’. And with decreasing attention span and declining face-to-face contact, people are finding it hard to relate to each other, connect with each other and hold on to relationships.That’s what makes social intelligence such an important virtue to develop. We, at Socialigence, define Social Intelligence as observing nonverbal behavior and understanding emotions for greater interpersonal effectiveness and self-management’. Yes! If we develop renewed interest and caliber to pay attention to people and to what they are conveying without saying it, then this simple change has a potential to enrich our lives as social beings to a great extent.

For instance, while interacting with a family member, a relative, a friend or a colleague, this skill can help you gauge from his or her gestures and postures whether the person’s emotional state is negative or positive’ or that of appeal or avoidance’. Then you can zero in on the exact emotion by observing the face.

This knowledge can be utilized to then prepare the most apt response on your part based on the context and setting. Now, the best part of social intelligence skill is that once you have responded in the chosen manner, you can observe if that response has generated the desired effect as the effect can again be observed by the change in that person’s gestures, expressions or postures. 

Now, what makes this skill even more important for interpersonal success is the fact that in the contemporary world, all relationships are overwhelmed by the need to stand strong in the onslaught of unprecedented speed of change! It makes an even more strong case for creating stable and supportive relationships.

And what damages a relationship most is unresponsiveness’. And that unresponsiveness is and ability to observe’. This skill of social intelligence’ and the knowledge associated with it builds an interpersonal bridge by reviving one’s focus towards the importance of paying attention to people and then strengthening their skill-set to do it competently mostly born out of disinterest. And that disinterest is mostly a side-effect of less willingness. 

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